Posion Ivy Blogs season one
by adventure time idiota1
Summary: Uh, Hi? I'm uh, Pamela Isley and I'm making these video diaries for my class and college application and stuff... hope you like them I guess.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: dont own batman, any of the characters. And this is NOT a rip off of joker blogs. I was going to make this a actual video blog but its been a few months so I thought I could get it out there. I still might do the video blog. Also credit for my bestie for helping me write this**

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Poison Ivy's video blog! Episode 1

~ a static veil opens up to a dark small bedroom. In the middle is a red headed girl in a green tank top and purple stoner hat fiddles with the camera befor falling back into a brown desk chair~

Pam- ok ok I got... Yes. Um, hello. My name is is uh is P-Pamela. B-b-but you guys could call m-me Pam or Pammy, uh m-m-my f-friend Harley likes to c-call me red. Don't call me that pl-ple-please. Ok so I uh I am a senior at uh G-Gotham city high and uh yeah. So we-were supposed to make these videos, f-f-for our college applications. It's supposed t-to show our interests and stuff. So I've decided to make a show abou-about plants and uh stuff... Cause a um... God DAHMIT! There were to many make up tutorials and those stupid human puppets screeching about boys! I can't STAND that."

~static~

Pam- I can't

~static~

Pam- how can't

~static~

Pam- edit

~static~

Pam- sorry about that. Ill figure out the editing for what I show my teachers. Just disregard that part(sigh) p-please? Any way were was I ugh I um, so this I-is a show about plants, I -I am really passionate about plants and en-environmental pro-pr-(god)protection. That's why the titles p-poison ivy. My friend Harley has a REALLY strong sense of irony. She's Studying criminal phsyco analysis. And gymnastics! I mentioned irony right?

~static~

Pam- oh god this has been a really long intro-intra-tri-DUCTION. I'm just gonna get to the point

~picks up African violets~

Pam- these are African violets. Now these plants don't take-take a lot of uh of w-water so you uh have to be REALLY

~cell phone rings~

Pam-ugh a where? Where? Ah! Hello?

~Pam stands up so only chair and part of legs are visible~

Pam- Harley? Yeah hi uh... They posted who's coming? It's on th-the school web-web-s-site? Jesus Harls calm down.! Professor Woodrues coming? He's from Boston U right? Harl? Just HARL! A man in his late thirties can't be cute. Ok I'll see. Seeya Harls.

~turns to camera~

Pam-I guess I've got to sign off? So uh huh bye?

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**reveiw please.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Decided to take a break from my doctor who binge**

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Poison ivy blogs 2 explanation

~static same girl sits back in her chair~

Pam- hi uh yeah hi... It's me again (pathetic smile) geez ok so sorry about last time. I couldn't figure out the editing and th-then I didn't have time to to finish s I just posted that. I suppose an ex-ex-ex-planation is in order. You see uh some college professors are coming down to assist teaching the senior class. M-m-more prep-p-parration for our future. If you ask me, workshops are the best way b-but I'm not in charge.

~ Pam looks off in the distance grimly static~

Pam- well Harley called to tell me that they posted who was coming. There's forensic scientists and and uh geologists and uh... Well I'm most excited about dr. Jason Woodrue. He is a professor at Boston university for botany and ecology. I thought I could use this episode to give some background information for those who are interested.

~pulls laptop over~

Pam-dr Jason Woodrue. Born 1978 in star city one of the most brilliant but secluded minds in the field of p-plant research. Dr Woodrue is a uh a ex-extensive advocate for environmental protection. There h-have been rumors that dr Woodrue is work on plant/animal DNA is both inhuman and stupid (?) dr Woodrue pushes that his work could revolutionize the human immune system.

~Pam has a sparkle in her eyes but her face falls~

Pam- dr Woodrue recently celebrated his 7th anniversary with his wife Janice Confino-Woodrue.

~static~

~ veil opens up and it shows Pam in center, her hair is ruffled and her hat s off. Behind her her bedding has been thrown on the floor and the laptop lies at the other end of the room~

Pam- um I um

~static~

Pam- s think we left off last time w-with African violets. Like I said before they don't take a lot of of water because uh because they are used to hot climate and uh ... Um they are succulents so so uh so they can hold their own water. Also it's uh it's a good idea to pluck the uh dead leaves to keep it from spreading to the plant. You you you can uh put those in the dirt to help mulch. Another good tip is to, uh is... Is...

~Gives exasperated sigh and puts down plant~

if there is really people out there who are complaining about dr Woodrue, there is no reason to and you know it. None of you want anyone smart or revolutionary to get noticed so you keep them down! But that is NOT going to happen! Not if I have anything to say about it.

~static~


	3. Chapter 3

Poison ivy episode 3 Rally

Pam- wow just wow. Dr Woodrue spoke today. He he is uh um uh... Uh a genius. His speech on self recycling biomass was... Amazing. And his points on environmental protection were inspirational. And uh (blushes) afterwards I was walking u walking uh back to my locker with uh Har-har-Harley, and uh he approached us, well uh me. He asked me to go with him to a rally against Wayne enterprises new project. Ap-perhently my teachers told him I was the "plant nut". I should have gone with him. I could have explained to the police.

~static~

Pam- I'm sure you all have seen on the news that dr Woodrue was arrested at the rally for assaulting a GCPD officer. But it's not true! I saw the clip. The officer pushed him first! Those assholes control the media. Corruption everywhere. I HATE that!

~static~

Pam- oh god! I'm sorry it's I'm.. Oh god

~static~

Pam- this is getting way to personal. This is supposed to be about plants. Ill edit this Ou...

~phone buzzez~

Pam- you left the kitchen sink on again #knockknovkitsopen? What?

~door bursts open~

Harley- did you get my text?

Pam- yeah

Harley- well you didn't text me back

Pam: Harley, can't you see I'm in the middle of a vlog?

Harley: Really? (Looks into camera and waves) Hiiiiiii!

Pam: Harley, please... I... I need to- to finish these... They're really important for my-

Harley: Y'know, Red, you're not gonna be young forever. Will you please get out of this dark room and come shopping with me? You promised you would! Seriously, it's like a prison cell in here!

Pam: (muttering) I'd rather be in the prison cell if it meant I was supporting Dr. Woodrue's cause...

Harley: Do you have a crush, Pam?

Pam: N- no...

Harley: Okay fine, if you won't admit it, will you at least go to the mall today? I heard there's a sale on organic t-shirts...

Pam: You know I can't say no to that. (To the camera.) Okay, I'll, um, have to end this video for now. I'll be back as soon as Harleen here is... Is done putting me through girly hell...

Harley: Pam, stop being so angsty. What's wrong?

Pam: Nothing, Harls... Just drop it.

Harley: Okay, okay... But shopping will take your mind off it, right?

Pam: I guess...

Harley: Okay. You're awesome, Red, y'know? (To the camera.) Bye!

(Static)


	4. Chapter 4

Poison ivy blogs episode 4

~static~

~ camera opens to Pam sitting on a bench next to a box of geraniums~

Pam- ok um hey guys? So uh s-sorry for the whole " unedited freak out" thing. Again. Good news. they they let out dr woodrue last week and ge started teaching. he is... awsome! Huh so uh... As you c-can see, I'm outside, I'm at school. I re-realize that I haven't done anything "plant related" it's its it's really just been one big vlog. So today we'll be planting geraniums. I pulled some strings with the gro-groundskeeper at my school.

~static~

Pam- ok so I I already dug some h-holes. Make sure the the holes are slightly wider than the plant container. To to take out the plant you squeeze the sides to loo-loosen the dirt from around it and s- so it comes out cleanly and you don't break the stalk. B-before you put it in the hole you you should break up the bottom to rip out dead roots and free them. When you put the plant in the hole cover it w-with the dirt you already used. You would probably already think of that (stupid)

~static~

Pam- so I planted the rest of of the geraniums. They take more water than the violets especially when they have just been planted so...

Nathan- oh look it's little Pammy! What are ya doin Pammy?

Pam- n-n-n-nothing n-n-Nathan

Nathan- n-n-n-nothing n-n-Nathan HA!

Pam- I I was just leaving so...

Nathan- oh no I would hate to interrupt your Date with your plant boyfriend!

~ the group laughter implies a large group~

Nathan- did you get a job here as groundskeeper? I could have paid you more to mow MY lawn shirtless!

(Hahahahaha)

~Pam turns red~

Nathan- bet you need the money. Get this! Her dad drives a delivery truck!

(Hat har har har)

Random group member- talk about low food chain!

Pam- SHUT UP!

~ she clamps a hand over her mouth~

Group- oooooooooooooooooh

Pam- look ill just leave ok

~Pam leans forward to turn off the camera. Nathan partly enters shot~

Nathan- check it

~Nathan poses to step on the flowers~

Pam- NOOOOOO

~Pam jumps on his back and they tumble to the ground~

Nathan- what the hell!

~ Nathan kicks Pam off shot. The camera gets tossed around and various boys jump in and out of the shot. The sounds of a fight are in the back round. Pam is screaming.~

Dr Woodrue- hey! HEY! GET OFF OF HER!

~the sounds of scuffling continue and boys run through the shot, the camera is turned to show Pam lying on the ground with dr Woodrue partly in the shot~

Dr. Woodrue- yeah you better run! I know all your names you are in BIG TROUBLE!

~dr Woodrue kneels down and holds Pam by her back~

Dr Woodrue- are you alright?

Pam- I can't feel my legs

Dr Woodrue- I'm taking you to the hospital.

~dr Woodrue picks up Pam and runs away~

~static~


	5. Chapter 5

Poison ivy episode 5

~static~

~camera opens to Pam with a black eye and one arm is tied with gauze~

Pam- hello. As you can see from uh my last video I have- had a little problem. Normally I wouldn't have posted that... But dr Woodrue says that posting the video could help myself and other people who are bullied. He also said that I shouldn't edit these videos anymore. That I shouldn't sensor my soul. If you couldn't tell I've been spending a lot of time with dr Woodrue. He... He visited everyday I was in the hospital. I was there three days. (Sick smile) uh he said well uh offered to have one on one lessons after school with me. I said yes. He thinks that I have potential with botanical science.

Harley- hey red wanna here a joke?

Pam- knock Harley

~Harley grabs a desk chair and scoots over~

Harley- no it's not a knock knock joke you see there's this guy and... Oh are you filming?

~Harley makes a sexy pose~

Pam- did you come to ham to the Internet?

Harley-yes

Episode Whatever (continued)

Pam: Harley...

Harley: (mocking) Paaaaaaam...

You didn't even let me finish my joke! So there's this guy, and he's rich and there's also this poor guy, and they go into a hospital-

Pam: I don't have time for this, Harleen.

Harley: You know, Red, you really ought to smile more. Or at least get yourself a man.

Pam: Yeah, because your romance life is so jam-packed.

Harley: I have a boyfriend! Well, sort of. I went on a date with this guy, Jack Ryder, but he's such a creeper! He tried to lick my neck! What kind of guy wants to do that? I just wanted to drop a rock on his head...

Pam: (laughing) That's one way to get rid of a bad date. But Harley, but I really need to finish this vlog.

Harley- ok let's... Hey you stopped stuttering!

Pam- oh uh yeah. Dr Woodrue doesn't like it.

Harley- hey you didn't have a black eye when u visited you.

Pam- oh I um I hit it wrapping my arm

~static~


	6. Chapter 6

Poison ivy blogs episode 6

gone

~static~

Pam- hello. Well, recently two boys that go to my school have gone missing. They were with the boys that attacked me earlier. They were assigned detention with Dr Woodrue and they haven't been seen since. The principle wanted everyone doing these videos to , to use the videos to get the word out. Dr Woodrue said they left detention and drove off towards the lower east side. They suspect...

DAHMIT!

~Pam puts her head in her hands~

~static~

Pam- they suspect Dr Woodrue. BUT JASON WOULD NEVER DO THAT!

~static~

Pam- how could such those IDIOTS ever suspect such a good man! A great man! Of being a pedophile! He would never do that! Even if he was that kind of guy... He told me he didn't! Jason would never lie to me! The GCPD couldn't find any credible evidence against him but everyone thinks he did it. How could they ruin a mans reputation like that? He was nearly fired! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT!

~static~

~Pam is holding her head in her hands~

~static~

~Pam looks darkly down at her desk and is breathing heavily~

Pam- ill edit this out of what I show my teachers. But I told Dr Woodrue that I'd say the truth on these.

~Pam leans in close to the camera~

Pam- I don't want them to be found.

Oh my god

~static~


	7. Chapter 7

Poison ivy blogs episode7

Jason

~static~

Pam- hey! If uh you haven't guessed... I'm really excited! Um heheh I'm going to a rally with dr Woodrue. It's in front of Wayne enterprises. Jason said there's gonna be cameras and stuff. Hehe...

~ Pam looks away to hide her nerves~

Pam- Jason said it'll be fun. How could I say no to him. Besides... You remember what happened last time. He told me he needs me. He needs me.

~door opens and dr Woodrue comes in and puts his hand on Pam's shoulder~

Pam- thank you for entering my house?

Woodrue- you said your dad was gone till midnight, thought there was no reason for formalities. Why waste perfectly good brain cells.

Pam- r-right as always d-dr...,

Woodrue- Pam, what did we talk about?

~dr Woodrues grip becomes visibly tighter on the blushing Pam~

Pam- yeah right, no stuttering, no dr Woodrue

Woodrue- are these the videos?

Pam- yup.

Dr Woodrue- do you mind?

~ dr Woodrue moves his hand to Pam's face and turns her to him. She nods weakly. Dr Woodrue grabbed the desk chair and pulled it up.~

Dr Woodrue- hey Internet! I hope there are a lot of you watching! You could learn something. This girl, best prodigy I have every seen!

Pam- your cheesy!

Dr. Woodrue- your adorable

~Pam rests her head on dr Woodrues shoulder but they realize what they were doing and jump~

Dr Woodrue- we should get going.

Pam- yeah...

~dr Woodrue helps Pam up so only lower bodies visible~

Pam- you sure my dad won't get in trouble if I go with you?

Dr Woodrue- don't worry your pretty little mind

~static~

~camera opens to Jason and Pam sitting next to each other giggling ~

Pam- that was... Totally Awsome!

Dr Woodrue- you my dear, have quite a temper!

Pam- oh, uh yeah.

~Pam looks down but dr Woodrue moves her chin to face him~

Dr Woodrue- it's nothing to be ashamed of darling you were amazing( turns to camera) I'm sure you'll here this on the news. Pam here punched Lucius fox across the face!

Pam- well he said that we were only publicizing Wayne enterprises new development. Wait that's on tv! I'm so dead!

~both burst out laughing for a long time till they stop short and look into each others eyes~

~static~

~Pam is no longer wearing her coat or hat. Neither is professor Woodrue. He threw her into the desk~

Dr Woodrue- I said edit it out!

~ dr Woodrue shoves Pam into her desk~

~static~

~the door slams and its just Pam staring at the camera in a daze. Her nose is bleeding. She produces a rose, gives the camera a stare, and sniffs the rose~

~static~


	8. Chapter 8

Poison ivy blogs episode 8

~static~

~ Pam is moaning and is grinding her forehead against the desk so you can't see her face~

Pam- ya know. The media is pretty funny. Once my dad was in the news. He drives delivery trucks for Wayne enterprises. He had the trucks converted to diesel. It was in those word things at the bottom. The ones no one reads. You would think that all those trucks now running on diesel and the impact on the environment would at least be mentioned.(raises head) but nooooo. Everyone is always so hung up on who Thomas Elliot is dating! Or one of the top students at Gotham high attending a protest against Wayne enterprises new forest development with a known radical and punching the VP in the face. Oh!

~Pam slams her head on the desk. Harley enters~

Harley- Red! Your on tv! Your dead!

Pam- not now harl I'm self loathing

Harley- you are so dead you got buried next to Kristen Stewart's career! How could you go on tv without me!

Pam: Harley, please not now...

Harley: Pam, be honest. You're in love with Dr. Woodrue!

Pam: well that came out of nowhere...

Harley: no, Red, it didn't. Since when do you, of all people, publicly punch someone in the face? I'm studying to be a psychologist, Pam. And I know that there's something going on.

Pam: You're crazy. Now will you please just let me get back to my flowers? I've neglected them for like five episodes.

Harley: I may be crazy but I'm not as crazy as you, you plant freak. Honestly, you're like, more plant than human.

Pam: Harleen I can't be in love with ja-dr Woodrue. He's 35. And he's married! Even if she's as horrible as he says.

Harley- then what happened in your last video.

Pam:uhhhh

Harley: Pamela Isly, you have a crush, why won't you admit it? It's big enough to get you on TV!

Pam: What's wrong with believing in something?

Harley: Nothing. I'm just saying, something pretty big must've happened to you that you got onto the news BEFORE ME...

Pam: it's not a big deal, okay? And will you keep it down? My parents don't know about-

(Angry voice from dowstairs)

Mr. Isly: PAMELA LILLIAN ISLEY! WHY ARE YOU ON THE NEWS!

Harley: I'd better go. Good luck, Pammy.

Pam reaches up and turns off the camera.

(Static)


	9. Chapter 9

Episode nine: teeth

~static~

~ as the camera opens Pam looks sick~

Pam- well.. Uh I um... Earlier today... They found the... Remains of those boys who went missing. Lets just say, they had to identify them by dental history .

~static~

Pam- sorry I um... Don't like blood. Not that there was any. But... They deserve...

Dr Woodrue- Pam. I have news.

~dr Woodrue comes into the room. Pam gets up and puts her arms around his neck~

Pam- what is it swee...

~static~

~ Pam and Jason are sitting next to each other. They are holding hands on the table~

Pam- you don't have to say.

Dr Woodrue- no, I told you to be honest, it's only fair. The media will get to it anyway.( sighs) my wife and I are getting a divorce. Apparently there is a question of faithfulness.

Pam- oh no. No no. I swear I didn't tell anyone I swear!

~Pam brings her arms to her face~

Dr Woodrue- will you stop! Not a question of my faithfulness! Don't worry. You know I don't have feelings for her. I'm only worried that ill have to move up my newest project before all the messy divorce crap rears its head. But I think I'm about ready.

~ Woodrue gives Pam a once over~

Pam- you still don't deserve to go through this.

~Pam hugs dr Woodrue. The hold each other for a long time befor pulling away and staring in each others eyes.~

Dr woodrue- Pamela. When will you turn 18?

Pam- 2 months. Has it mattered before?

Dr. Woodrue- no

~static~

Dr Woodrue- I will see you tomarrow for tutoring miss Isley. We"ll ... Review again.

Pam- it's what I live for.


End file.
